Sunday, September 18, 2011

Week 3

September 18, 2011

Depending on who you are, you'll either view this weekend as one to remember, or one to forget.  For most of us, I think the first option will suffice, at least for me.  I don't think I've been as sick as I was this weekend in quite a long time - perfect timing for three performances within 26 hours of one another.  Under normal circumstances this would have been a challenge, but this took me far beyond my limits.  No amount of physical training or preparation could have readied me for this weekend. Given how everything played out though... with the team getting the win and the band putting on good performances at every venue, I'm glad it went as well as it did.

It's funny how people jump to conclusions about things.  After I came back from the EMS center (took me back there because I overheated) and got my phone after halftime at the Temple game, I had about a dozen messages asking me if I broke my ankle.  Clearly yes, I had a rough landing, but, did I not get up, grab my mace and strut back across the field ten seconds later?  Did it not look like I was trying to tie the laces of my right cleat which came untied?  Not sure I could have completed the rest of pregame otherwise.  Thinking about it, it still plays out like horror to me - absolute worst-case-scenario.  Without going into painstaking detail, because I really don't feel like it, I was told that having a strong antibiotic adds to dehydration, which lead to my entire right leg cramping up upon landing the first flip, and as I was running back through the band there was nothing I could about it.  I had two options - to just not do the second flip (to the probable displeasure of all of the Penn State fans), or to muster up what I had left and take a chance, which I ended up doing.  I just didn't have it in me.  At the two other exhibitions we did this past weekend, I only did the first one.  Yeah, Drum Majors haven't landed them in the past, but I expect out of myself to land every single one, there's really no excuse... ...and I hate using illness as an excuse, because honestly, it's not an excuse.  When I take the field, nobody knows how I'm feeling that day - they're still going to expecting to see the same thing they're used to seeing.  I expect to do better each time I go out there, not worse.  I'm extremely unhappy with myself for being sick in the first place, and then having it affect my performance.  I take care of myself, eat healthy, sleep at least 7 hours a night (if not more), exercise regularly, and avoid contact with those who are sick.  I hate being a disappointment.  Thank god for the defense from the team.  Had they lost the game, I'm pretty sure I'd never hear the end of it.

I'm still feeling awful and I only have five days to get myself together.  It's going to be a tough week, but I know what I signed up for and I need to improve.

1 comment:

  1. You are human, like everyone else, and you need to cut yourself a break. You are not a robot. But you are the most dedicated Blue Bander ever I think.